I know that there's something about my life that isn't quite right
I can't point it out , but i just know .. like everyone know , but don't give it much thought
I can say that it stopped being a life for sometime ago , the scene has frozen , the words are repeated from the same hidden radio everyday in the same tone
I thought i remember , in the little book about life for beginners, i once read
"it's completely "forbidden" (in flashy red ink) that life should ever be predictable
so why is it violating this strict rule in my case?
why is it so stupidly boring ?
what ? has the beginner's book changed without anyone telling me about it ?
did we force (out of fear of the unknown) life to be predictable ?
did we kill the main reason why life is a life ! , did we kill "c'est la vie !" with it's beautiful exclamation mark ?

it's a very weird , or very brave action to write to yourself
cause that what's writing in a blog with 2 followers basically means :-D
it shows you how awfully you love writing , that you deny the fact that nobody's reading
it shows you that writing in itself is your medicine
that it's still enlightening , even if it's just turning on the torch for you alone in a dark room
that you'll still do it , no matter how stupid it may look
you'll talk to yourself , you'll squeeze your mind for the right word
because it feels so damn good when you find the right word
it's still rewarding , even with "zero" readers
so , dear" me" .. have a lovely night :-)

sometimes , to be compatible with your fellow members of the society , you feel obliged to need what they need , and do what they do
you feel obliged to be a silent copy , although you're a genuine version
it's a rule , you shouldn't be different
cause that's a big danger , especially in a society like here in egypt
everyone , i mean everyone is concerned about your life , and thinks it's his faithful job to advise you , regardless this precious advice is needed or not , whether it fits your situation or not
whether you'll accept what he accepts , believe what he believes
he/she just talks , and thinks it's his divine message to express his -totally unwelcome - opinion anyway
we're like a quality insurance observer on the behavior of everyone else except ourselves
we are members of the same society , because we live on the same place or share some similarities , color , language .. etc , but we shouldn't share all , we shouldn't be similar in everything
we shouldn't all be selling , ( the job that everyone end up working in one way or the other)
we shouldn't all be wearing skinny jeans , we shouldn't all be sharing the same religious beliefs
everyone should get enough free space to say , " well , i don't want to do this , and i don't have to explain why , i'm mature enough to know what's good for me "